House Party Fail

On Saturday, May 30, 2015 we went to a house party in Queens.  This is the same party we went to for New Years Eve and blogged about under the title "New Years Eve House Party (Bringing in 2015 with a Bang)."  We think the hosting couple is wonderful, but we just have to be honest in these blog posts, so sadly, we have to label this party as a fail.  There were several reasons it was a fail, but we will just focus on the two most important ones.  One is that there was a major hotel takeover party being thrown in New Jersey by Share Nation on the same night.  Second, the hosts failed over invite.  ALWAYS over invite for a lifestyle party.  You get 20 couples confirmed?  You will be lucky if 10 show up.  It is extremely unlikely that every couple will show up, and if you do, you just have a larger party.  For this party the hosts confirmed 11 couples. 

Ultimately there were four of us that showed up and one bailed very early, probably because they felt insulted.  The female was a vegan and to get an idea of the conversation that occurred:
 
Vegan: A vegan is someone who doesn't consume animal based products.
Non-Vegan: So if you swallow cum does that mean you really aren't a vegan?
Vegan: (Silence)
 
So you see, she probably wasn't a happy camper that her dietary habits were being questioned.  So they left and that led to the dreaded three couple party.  Another couple was supposed to arrive, but never did so at some point we went to go play.  So it was the hosts, Brenda and John (of course not their real names), us, and another couple who we will call Stacey and Kevin.  Kevin was better looking than Stacey, which is not typical of couples in the lifestyle.  Normally it is the woman who is better looking than the man.  She was a brunette, not thin, but not really overweight, attractive, but nothing to rave about.  Reading that back sounds harsh, but that is what it was.  So we all start getting undressed, Stacey and John head to a futon bed in the play area and Brenda and Kevin head over to an air mattress.  Stacey started going down on John and I was finger her from behind when the futon tipped over and the metal frame landed right on the top of my foot.  That hurt bad, lol.  My girlfriend and I then went on another bed and was making out.  Kevin left Brenda and asked if we could change things up.  We thought that was odd, I mean, your wife is having sex with Brenda's husband, that means you go play with Brenda...that is what a full swap is lmao.  I think it was a bit insulting to Brenda.  From my perspective it was as if he was saying, I don't want to play with you, but instead I want to go play with her.  If he wanted to swap with us he should have planned it out better with his wife before the playing started.  That is what we do.  So we declined his very nice offer and played with ourselves.  I went down on my girlfriend until she came and then she went down on me.  At some point both Stacey and John and Brenda and Kevin finished and then they were all hovering around our bed.  That was slightly awkward.  Stacey went to the bathroom and came back and my girlfriend and her began making out.
 
Stacey then laid my girlfriend onto the bed and went down on her.  I began finger Stacey from behind.  Her husband Kevin told me he wanted to see me fucker her while she ate at my girlfriend, which was really code for, I really want to fuck your girlfriend, please fuck my wife.  So I obliged.  I began fucking her doggy style and she did continue to eat out my girlfriend for a little while but then Kevin finally got to play with her as he clearly wanted to do from the beginning.  As I'm fucking Stacey she is just really wet and I have this thought...is she on her period?  Now you may think this as an odd thought, but there has been a few times in the past where I've played with girls that I thought were super wet and well...it was their period.  It was dark in the room so I couldn't tell.  I then move her into missionary and fuck her in that position until I come, which surprisingly is almost at the exact same time Kevin cums.  I then excused myself to toss the condom into the garbage which was in a more well lit area and sure enough, blood all over me.  Terrible.  I cleaned myself up and when I come out my girlfriend tells me that Stacey wants her to go down on her.  I told her absolutely not, she has her period.  Meanwhile, how can she not know she has her period?  There were bloody paper towels in the garbage when I went to toss my condom, so John definitely knew, because he had to clean himself off as well.  Then Stacey went to the bathroom, so shouldn't she have realized it then before coming out to play with us?  Playing with someone on their period raises the risk of potentially contracting something and just because someone was tested recently doesn't mean they haven't gotten something since.  Very frustrating when things like that happen.
 
So that was pretty much it.  My girlfriend and I cleaned ourselves up and we called our Uber to wisk us back to Long Island.  Oh and one last note, they had absolutely no food, not even chips, pretzels, or anything.  Parties do need some sort of finger foods...goes under party planning 101.  Any party advise or printed book on the topic covers that.  Alcohol + no food = bad combination and any party where you are going to be present for several hours, in this case five, you will get hungry and need something, especially vigorous sexual activity.  So if I were to give advise to the hosts, it would be (1) Significantly over invite, and (2) Put out a bowl out of party mix please.

The Mayor's Dix Hills Party - 2015 Review

Every year I say we are done with the Mayor's parties, but a weekend always comes a long where there is nothing else going on, so we go.  This party took place on May 23, 2015.  This is a house party which also allows pre-screened single men to attend.  We've decided that since we were now re-exploring that aspect of the lifestyle that even if we didn't meet an attractive couple there, we should be able to meet a quality single guy at the party.  We took an Uber there as we won't drink and drive.  Admission for couples is $50.00 and single men $70.00.  As described in previous reviews, the Mayor has a nice size home with four bedrooms to play in on the main level and additional play space in the basement.  There is a beautiful back yard with a large heated in ground pool and a hot tub.  There is a spread of hot and cold food and it is bring your own booze.  The party begins at 10 p.m. and concludes at approximately 3 a.m. 
 
The couple that hosts the parties does not like their information being shared.  The easiest way to find them is to simply go on Swing Lifestyle (SLS) and you will see their events listed in the hot date/events section when they have them.  They also have a website at: http://hotycoupl.wix.com/themayorsclub
 
We arrived at 10 p.m. and there were several couples already there.  I saw an attractive brunette in the living room when we first walked in.  She was thin, tall, nice sized breasts, mid-forties.  For the remainder of this post we will call her Alison.  We began speaking with Alison and the group she was socializing with.  Her husband, who we will call John, was a very nice guy, but my girlfriend was not attracted to him in any way.  I figured that we would just continue speaking with them until an attractive couple walked in the door where there was attraction to both the male and female and we would eject from Alison and John.  Then John said something that was music to my ears, that at parties, they don't feel the need to play in the same room, that they go and do their own thing.  We chatted with them and others for maybe about an hour and a half.  A single male, mid thirties, Hispanic, well dressed, approached my girlfriend and began flirting with her during this time, so she paired off with him and began dancing with him on the dance floor.  I went into the kitchen with Alison and did a few shots and then she asked me to take her to one of the bedrooms.  We played just the two of us for about thirty or so minutes.  The usual routine, she went down on me, I went down on her, then we had sex, missionary, to girl on top, to missionary again and then I came.  I really enjoyed playing with her.  Aside from my girlfriend, she was the most attractive woman at the party and she was really sweet and fun. 
 
We then headed back out to the living room for drinks to rehydrate.  My girlfriend was really into the single guy she paired off with, who we will call David.  She wanted to play with him while I watched, so we took him to one of the bedrooms.  It was really a great experience watching them play.  He was very well endowed and must have been equipped with a supersized energizer battery, because the stamina on this guy was insane.  He fucked my girlfriend every which way and she was simply on cloud nine.  At some point they needed a little break so we went back out to the living room and had drinks and some sandwiches and talked.  Then we headed back to one of the bedrooms and had a threesome, both alternating between receiving oral and fucking my girlfriend.   I have to say that this was probably the best experience we've had with a single guy.  He was respectful, charming, understood what we were looking for, and really made the night for us.  He even asked me permission if he could play with her before we even went to the bedroom.  Which of course is in stark contrast to another guy who was waiting outside the bedroom door and asked me when I stepped out to use the bathroom if he could get a turn next.  I'm sorry, but she isn't a ride at an amusement park where you get a turn.
 
While overall we had a great time, I must admit that no other attractive couples came into the party aside from one, which for some reason the male half just doesn't like us.  Never understood why.  But, they are a young and very attractive couple.  Aside from that, the crowd was generally much older, forty to sixty, as opposed to our usual parties which cater to the twenty to forty crowd.  There was also a disproportionate amount of larger women (BBW) that were in attendance.  We have always found his parties hit or miss if you fall into the younger attractive couple category, but we have had success in the past at the parties so I suppose we will keep attending.

The Importance of Certifications, Validations, and Testimonials

On each site they are called something different, but their purpose is the same. It allows one member to give a public review of another member that they have met.
 
For the remainder of this articles I will just use the term certifications.
 
We use certifications as a screening tool. We would prefer others to have met you and played with you and then taken the affirmative step to give you a certification telling all of the online service you are using how wonderful you are. The more of these certifications you have, the more at ease we are with meeting you because you’ve somehow convinced a large group of people that you are not an undesirable.
 
If someone tells us that they do not give or accept certifications, we look at it as a red flag. It may be a true statement, but we would rather pass on that person or couple. Typically people who say such things are either a fake profile or they want to be discreet. This is not a vanilla social media site we are connecting in. Everyone is on here for same or similar reasons. We don’t use full names and most of the time people block out face photos on the public albums. This isn’t a site where if you post a certification for someone your co-workers or family get a notification on the top of their screen. And certifications can be as simple as, “We met so and so and they were really cool and down to earth.” There is no need to describe every sexual act you may or may not have done.
 
The lack of certifications can also be an indication of a fake profile (a catfish, a married man, etc.). If the profile is more than a year old and there is no certifications then there is a very high likelihood that the profile is fake. If you are active in the lifestyle for a year, you should have met other couples or singles that could provide you with a certification during that time. This is also true if there is one certification attached and the profile that certified them also only has one certification.
 
No certifications on a particular site is not necessarily a red flag if the single or couple is on other sites as well. When someone messages us with no certifications, if there is initial attraction from their photos we may ask if they are on other sites. Personally we have the same screen name on several lifestyle sites. For instance, on Adult Friend Finder we have 1 testimonial, but on Swing Lifestyle (SLS) we have 76 certifications, Swingers Date Club (SDC) we have 9 validations, and on Sexxy Mofo we have 12.
 
We are frequently told by couples and singles that they have had a good number of experiences off of the site they are on. If you have no certifications and you tell us that, it is a red flag. If you had a good experience with someone, why did they not certify you? If you had multiple experiences with different couples or singles, how is it possible that not a one gave you a certification?
 
Certifications are extremely important. If you meet a single or couple you enjoyed spending time with you only befit them by giving them a certification and you only help yourself in asking for one, especially if you have none. Certifications make you stand out from the countless profiles that simply have none.

Instructions for Single Men


These are instructions on specifically how to go about meeting us.  This does not apply to all couples, but reading the below instructions and following them will likely benefit you with interactions with many couples involved in  the swinger, hotwife, cuckold, and polyamorous lifestyles.
(1)    Read Our Profile.
(2)    Send a message, NOT an instant message.
(3)    In that first message include g-rated photos that include your face sans glasses or hats.
(4)    During your first message, DO NOT:
a.       Discuss sexual activities.
b.      Ask to play.
c.       Ask to meet us for drinks.
(5)    Expect to exchange several messages and then ask for her KIK information and then continue the interaction using KIK.
(6)    You should be pursing the interactions.  We are extremely busy and are easily distracted by attractive couples, single females, and the party scene.  Not to mention we receive a significant amount of messages across several different lifestyle sites.  It is easy for people to fall through the cracks, so if you don’t wish to fall through the cracks, keep the conversation going with us.
(7)    Expect that you will be speaking with us for a period of time prior to any possibility of meeting.  Why?  It is not because we are looking for a new best friend or to form a polyamorous triad/triangle.  Rather it is because single men, while they like to think of themselves as part of the lifestyle, typically have no idea what the lifestyle is really about.  Understand that single men are a dime a dozen.  Not only that, really attractive single men are a dime a dozen.  Based upon the laws of supply and demand, we can take our time and choose our sexual partners wisely and not settle for mediocrity.  We want to avoid drama, stalkers, creeps, and asshole.  We want to make sure that you are a sane, grounded guy that we can have fun with and who will understand the limitations of our interactions.  We also want to make sure we are not going to waste a perfectly good Friday or Saturday night on you.  There are only so many of them a year and as a group single men have a surprisingly high flake rate, which does not even take into account the possibility of not having chemistry in person.  To do that we need to converse for a period of time to make sure that there are no red flags.
(8)    If you want to raise your chances of meeting us then invite us to a party.  This party can be a lifestyle party, a poly play party, or even a vanilla party (we promise we won’t embarrass you).  We just love parties.  If it is a lifestyle party however, please note that if it is a gangbang party or one that overwhelmingly caters to single men, it is not our scene.