SLS Group Party Review: Carnal Fun Sex Group

On Friday, July 13, 2018, we attended a hotel party in Queens, NY run by the group on Swing Life Style (SLS) called "Carnal Fun Sex Group."  The host had reached out to us in the past on both SLS and AFF and we saw they had a party listed in the events section on SLS.  The description for the party reads:

Hot Party Friday night July 13th Only a few days left to register for the play night on sls under the events calendar and send contact info to hosts. We still need to voice verify and talk about party details and safety rules with you both before the party. Ready to play or fulfill your fantasy? Party in Queens near Manhattan Hot Private Deluxe Swing Party in NYC. We have fourteen sls certifications and are meeting up with our swinging friends, couples and ladies only who voice and pic verify only. Ladies are bi or straight, men are straight. (No gay or bi men.) This is an upscale full swap, full choice, no jealousy private and discreet, deluxe, upscale swing party in NYC. We have many experienced and some new play partners. We play safely and enjoy hours of shared pleasure. Send your contact info to the host to get more detailed information and to get on the party list. This is a hotel party for members who have voice and picture verified with us. Must be over 21, safe and well groomed, and clean. This is a non smoking event for safe play. Looking forward to seeing you and playing soon on Friday night July 13th!

Upon signing up for the event on SLS the host messaged us asking us to RSVP on KIK and they provided us with their KIK screen name.  We had no idea what he meant by RSVPing on KIK.  As a side note, we have noticed a trend on the different lifestyle sites of people wanting to communicate on KIK.  Upon connecting with him on KIK the host sent us a photo of him and his girlfriend and requested that we voice verify and wanted to schedule a time to do so.  Now mind you that we have almost 90 certifications on SLS and a number of certifications/validations/testimonials on the various other lifestyle sites out there, so we thought that was a bit much. In ten years of swinging and going to probably a couple of hundred parties not once has anyone ever asked us to voice verify.  We set a date and time and my girlfriend called in.  We were told it would be $80 to attend.  I had asked the host for a guest list but they wouldn't provide one for "privacy" of the guests.  I thought this was a bit silly.  He seems to be recruiting exclusively from SLS, AFF, and Feeld, which providing screen names on these services is not violating the privacy of those people.  We aren't asking for their real names or phone numbers.  But he did add us to a KIK group.  There are fifty people in the group and it was extremely difficult to figure out who was actually going and who wasn't.  The host had a rule that you had to ask permission in the group chat to individually message anyone.  We chatted with a variety of couples but they all seemed wishy washy.  We even agreed to meet one at Caligula two Fridays ago and they didn't show up (and flaked on the actual hotel party too).  Almost none of them are on SLS and the ones that are didn't have certifications, so we were pretty skeptical.  Then the comments made by the hosts in the chat room just were a bit odd.

"If anybody has any questions fantasy we can try to make it happen (assuming safe and consent).  For example some ladies dream to try dp sex."

"Reminder no perfume or cologne on play party date.  We love clean Otherwise people may sneeze"

"23 year old Italian lady attending, she's new."

"Reminder upscale party; no sneakers thanks."

"Jay and his lady confirmed returning members. (white couple)"

"White couple from Canada confirmed.  We should start our own UN"

The day prior to the party the hosts changed the hotel from Long Island City to one right near JFK airport because he claimed he could not get adjoining rooms.  Between the silly rules of the host and now this I found it to be amateurish.  There are couples like us that will book a room in the same hotel where a party is so they don't have to drive back.  In this case the hotel is not far from our place so we had the option of Ubering or driving and I would remain sober.  But changing hotels like that last minute can really impact guests.

We arrived at 9:40 p.m. and were the second couple there.  Right away we learn that the host is really a single guy.  There is no girlfriend.  He puts himself out as a couple in both his SLS profile and on KIK.  Meanwhile, this is supposed to be a couples only party.  In total 9 couples showed up.  Only one couple we spoke to on KIK actually showed and not surprisingly they were the only couple who had an SLS account with certifications.  About mid-way through the couples arriving a single guy showed up.  So now there are two single guys at the party, the host and this new addition.  The group as a whole was not desirable.  We were focusing in on the couple we were chatting with on SLS as the only option there when the last couple to arrive came in.  They were both young and attractive and after a brief introduction to the host and the group sat away from the group.  We decided to approach them to get to know them and the host, seemingly unaware of the concept of cockblocking, decided to try to get in on the conversation.  After he wandered off we began to vibe pretty good with the couple.  However, the obvious concern was playing.  They weren't interested in anyone else there and in that environment if two attractive couples go to play when everyone else hasn't started, they will all begin to watch and some will try to join in, which can be very uncomfortable.  And sure enough, a female half of one of the couples came over to us and suggested we all go into the other room and have sex so they can watch.  Like we are some kind of performers for them.  That was enough for the couple decide their time there was over.  My girlfriend and the girl exchanged numbers and off they went. During that time it didn't appear that anyone played and at least one couple snuck out of the party by going into the adjoining hotel room, which would have been the play room, and then heading out that room's door. No one even knew they left for a good while. We stayed a little longer, chatting with the couple we were originally interested in, but the mood of the party was just not sexual at that point and we decided to call it a night. We left around 12:30 a.m.

This party is definitely a pass.  The host just does not know what he is doing, doesn't really understand how successful parties are thrown, and the dishonesty over being a single guy is just a big no no.  If he reads this, which is likely to occur at some point, my recommendation to him would be the following:

- Recruit only off of SLS & Swingers Date Club (SDC).
- Only accept couples that have at least one certification/validation within the last year.
- Drop the voice verify.
- Exchange the guest list.  It will increase the likelihood of couples showing up.
- Do not change hotels the day before.
- Do not put yourself off as a couple when you are a single.
- Sneakers, cologne, and perfume are fine.
- A person's race or ethnicity is irrelevant, stop discussing it, it makes you look like a creep.

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